


As you are

by letsyesnomaybe



Category: One Direction (Band), Zayn Malik (Musician)
Genre: Kid Fic, M/M, Past Drug Use
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-06
Updated: 2016-04-06
Packaged: 2018-05-31 17:40:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6480262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/letsyesnomaybe/pseuds/letsyesnomaybe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zayn Malik's life has been full of complications. So, it's fitting really that he'd find out that he's got a five year old son he knew nothing about. Of course this little boy comes with his own complications, one of them being he'd recently lost his mother and the other that he thinks he already has a father. Of course, this father comes in form of muscles and a pretty face. Which is probably the most distracting of all the complications.</p><p> </p><p>  <i>"Zayn can’t help but love the way his name rolls of the other lad’s tongue but then he quickly scolds himself because having a thing for the person who your kid thinks is his dad but isn’t his dad but the best friend of your ex-girlfriend who for some reason forgot to mention she was pregnant, is way too complicated."</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	As you are

Zayn Malik is a pretentious arsehole.

Or at least that’s what Louis calls him every weekend, when he refuses to go to the dingy hipster in town so his ‘not very hipster' best mate can go inside and chat up the guy he’d seen go in there that one time.

It’s not that Zayn think he’s better than those people, it’s more that he knows. He walks in to a club like that and see’s people trying too hard to be something they’re not. An image Zayn hadn’t been presented with since he was a kid and refuses to go back.

So, instead he drags Louis out for the night to one of the higher end clubs on the opposite side of London. He flirts their way inside and their way through not having to pay for a single drink all night.

Zayn knows his own face. He knows the kid from Bradford that would venture to the wrong side of town to be called ‘alien race’ by the whites that lived there, has now been replaced by someone who is found ‘exotic’ by those exact same people. He uses it to his advantage, lets them buy his drinks and suck his cock and gives them nothing in return because they don’t deserve shit.

He tends to loose Louis on nights out and never really knows whose fault that is. Louis usually blames the one of them that had managed to pull and considering that’s usually Zayn, he guesses it must be his fault.

He knows this night in particular it’s his fault because he pulls some six foot six Liam Hemsworth looking fella, who uses his muscles to fuck Zayn against every wall of his penthouse.

He swigging from a bottle of Hennessey he’d stolen from the guy’s stash of alcohol by the time he makes it back to his apartment block. He’s too busy searching all his pockets for his keys that he doesn’t notice the person stood outside his door, until they clear their throat.

“Mr Malik?”

Zee shoves the bottle of whisky behind his back when he notices the guy looks a lot like some kind of law enforcement. There’s probably been another murder in his block that he’s got to have an alibi for. At least that’s usually why guys with receding hairlines and grey suits, show up to his apartment randomly.

“I’m not a cop.” The guy promises, hands held out in front of him like that’s some kind of proof.

“Sorry, s’instinct.” Zayn apologises as he puts the bottle down on the floor and resumes looking for his keys. “What can I do for you?”

“Are you Zayn Javadd Malik?” The guy asks.

“Are you sure you’re not a cop?” Zayn replies, tugging his keys from his pocket and searching through them to find the one he wants.

“My name is Steven Jones,” The guy informs him. “I’m a social worker.”

“Look if me sister has got herself in to trouble again, then call her boyfriend. She’s his problem not mine.” Zayn says and shoves the key in his apartment door, to open it.

“Do you happen to know Aaliyha Khan?” Steven asks.

Zayn pushes his apartment door open and turns to look at the older man questionably. “Why?”

“I’m afraid Miss Khan has passed away.” Steven informs apologetically.

Zayn swallows hard and steps closer to his apartment. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“You and Miss Khan dated?” Steven asks.

“When we were kids.” Zee replies, tugging his key from his door as he now stands inside his apartment.

“And did you end the relationship before or after the birth of your son Javadd?” Steven wonders, looking through his briefcase for some paperwork.

Zee snorts disbelieving. “We didn’t have a kid. I’m sorry to hear about Aaliyha but if she’s left a kid behind, it’s not mine.”

“Your name is on the birth certificate Mr Malik.” Steven informs him, holding out a piece of photocopied paper.

Zayn snatches the paper from his hand and lets his eyes scan over it. The top reads ‘Name: Javadd Khan’ and ‘Date of birth: 14th February 2010’ and below where it says ‘Surname and name of father: Zayn Javadd Malik’.

“This must be some mistake.” Zayn says in shock. “Aaliyha would have told me if she was pregnant.”

“I’m sorry, Mr Malik.” Steven replies and hands him another piece of paper. “Javaad is currently in our custody but if you sign this you can accept responsibility and I shall have one of my colleagues bring him around tomorrow morning.”

“You’re just gonna give me a kid?” Zayn scoffs, shoving the birth certificate back at the older man. “You’re insane.”

“I understand this must come as a shock,” Steven replies. “But we feel the best place for Javadd right now is with his father.”

“I’m a complete stranger to him.” Zayn reminds the man.

“So are my colleagues and I.” Steven says.

Zayn runs his fingers through his still sex mused hair and shakes his head in complete shock. Five minutes ago he was ready to shower and pass out in his bed, after a really good night of sex and boozing. Now, he has a kid.

“Look, you don’t have to sign anything right away.” Steven tells him. “I’ll bring Javadd by tomorrow, you two can meet and bond. If you still feel unsure then you’ll have my number and you can call me and I’ll take him back in to our custody.”

Zayn nods before his brain actually processes the words and accepts the file Steven pushes in to his hand before he steps back in to the apartment and closes the door.

It takes him ten minutes of freaking himself out before he picks up the file from where he’d dropped it on his coffee table. He rips off the elastic band and tugs out the wad of paper and then bends down to pick up a picture that had fallen on the floor.

It’s a picture of Aaliyha, looking as beautiful as she did when Zayn had kissed her goodbye for one last time when they were sixteen. Only there’s crinkles by her eyes to show she’s a few years older and her once long jet black hair is cropped in to a bob. There’s also a small child hanging off her hip.

Now it’s real because the little boy she’s holding- with jet black hair and big bambi like eyes- there’s no way in a million years Zayn would ever be able to deny him. It’s like he’s looking at all the photos his mum used to have of him when he was a baby.

Zayn drops on to the couch with the picture in one hand and the bottle of Hennessey in the other. He tries not to cry over the girl he once lost now being gone forever and the son he’d missed out on for five years because he’s a selfish bastard.

*

Zayn’s not sure what to expect when he opens the door the next morning but it’s certainly not the very good looking face he’s greeted with.

“Hello?” He greets, shamefully checking the man out.

He’s almost one muscle -his arms and chest looking like they’re about to escape from his fitted t-shirt at any minute-like Bruce Banner mid formation. His face is almost as nice to look at, it’s like a contrast to his body, all soft with an almost teddy bear like nose and pouty red lips. Zayn’s half asleep form is very interested in everything this man has to offer.

“So, you’re Zayn?” Muscles questions, eyes scanning Zayn in a completely different way. “I guess I can see why she was so infatuated.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re good to look at.” Muscles informs him, it doesn’t sound like a compliment.

“Thank you?” Zee replies, not sure if should be offended or not.

“Liam,” Someone whines from behind muscles. “Steven is only letting me do this because you promised you’d be good.”

“I’m not doing anything,” Muscles—Liam—replies and steps out of the way to reveal a guy with long hair that’s tied back in to a bun, which contrasts the suit covering his lanky frame. “They can’t expect us to leave him here with this guy, H.”

“Excuse me?” Zayn interjects. “Who are you?”

“I’m the person who’s been raising your child while you’ve been off…” Liam trails off but ends his sentence by looking inside Zayn’s apartment with disgust. 

Zayn opens his mouth to defend himself but a small call of ‘daddy’ cuts him off. The little boy from the picture appears at Liam’s feet, his tiny hands wrapping around the man’s leg as he hides from Zayn behind Liam’s thigh.

“He’s gonna hate me if I leave him here.” Liam complains to ‘H’.

“You haven’t got a choice,” H informs him and bends down to be the same height as Javadd. “Jav, buddy, this is Zayn. Remember me and daddy told all about how you’re going to hang out with him for a few days?”

Javadd pokes his head around to look at Zayn but the moment he sees Zayn is looking back at him, he hides his face back in Liam’s thigh.

“Hi, um,” Zayn stumbles, having no idea what he’s supposed to do here. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Liam scoffs. “This is ridiculous.”

“I’m Harry Styles,” H introduces, offering a hand to Zayn. “I was a friend of Ali’s.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Zayn replies, shaking his hand. “I have no idea what I’m supposed to be doing here.”

“I assumed so.” Harry agrees and nudges past Liam and Javadd to get inside Zayn’s apartment. “Steven is kind of an arsehole. In fact so is our entire legal system when it comes to the custody of kids. But here we are, so really, all we need you to do is spend the day with Jav then ring Steven and tell him you’re not up for being a father. Steven will then have you sign away your rights and Liam will have full custody of little J.”

“I only found I had a kid yesterday,” Zayn replies, eyes flicking to Javadd, who once again hides his face in Liam’s thigh when he notices Zayn looking. “And you expect me to sign away my rights to him after one day together.”

Liam lifts Javadd up off the floor and on to his hip. “You don’t look like you have the life fit to raise a child.”

“Who does?” Zayn argues.

“Everyone who doesn’t have empty bottles of Hennessey lying on the floor when they’re supposed to be taking care of a five year old, who inspects everything his hands come in to contact with.” Liam retorts, rubbing Javadd’s back as the child buries his face in the older man’s neck.

“Excuse me for being twenty three and having a night out—“Zayn shouts back but a small sniffle cuts him off and he instantly calms himself down, feeling like a dick. “Shit, I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want to leave him here, H.” Liam informs the other lad, his jaw clenched as he clutches to the child holding on to him just as tight.

“I told you,” Harry replies as he sits down on the couch. “You haven’t got a choice. But if you’d stop being an arsehole then maybe little J won’t be so upset about staying.”

“I’m sorry,” Zayn repeats, stepping towards Liam and the little boy. “I didn’t mean to shout. It’s been a weird couple of days.”

“Yeah, I don’t think I could handle coming home to find out I’d accidentally abandoned a kid for five years either.” Harry agrees, flicking through the file Steven had given Zayn.

“I don’t get why she wouldn’t tell me.” Zay admits, looking between the two men.

“Because she was a saint who thought the sun shone out of your arse for some reason,” Liam informs him, brushing Javadd’s hair from his face. “And no matter how many times I told her you had a right to know, she didn’t want to tell you and ruin your dream.”

“She’d be so fucking disappointed in me.” Zee sighs and then makes an annoyed noise at himself as Liam looks at him pointedly. “Sorry.”

Liam nods in acceptance and goes back to comforting Javadd, who seems to be less upset now as he plays with the neck of Liam’s shirt and whispers things to him that Zayn can’t quite make out.

“So, where you her, um, were you guys together?” Zayn asks awkwardly.

“No.” Liam replies simply as he finally walks inside the apartment.

“But he called you ‘daddy’.” Zayn points out.

“He needed a good male role model in his life,” Liam informs him. “Ali didn’t know how to explain why he was the only one in his class at school who didn’t have a daddy. So, we decided I’d take your place and now Ali’s gone and you’re here so all that ground work we put in place, to make sure he had a good life, is pretty much pointless.”

“Why are you judging me so hard?” Zayn demands. “I told you I didn’t know she was pregnant.”

“He’s not mad at you,” Harry informs him as he closes the file and stands back up. “He’s upset that we’ve lost her and he’s scared we’re going to lose the last piece of her we have left.”

“The only piece.” Liam argues, still holding on to Javadd ridiculously tight.

“Yeah.” Harry agrees softly.

“I’m sorry,” Zayn tells them. “Yesterday I was living life free of responsibility and I get home and there’s this guy telling me that the girl I was in love when I was sixteen had died, and just so happened to leave behind a kid that’s half mine. I asked for this about as much as you guys.”

“Then sign the paper and go back to that life,” Liam pleads. “We’ll take Jav and we’ll go back to our lives and you can go back to yours. No one has to be hurt.” 

Zayn shakes his head, hating the way Liam’s entire face drops as he does. “I’m sorry. I can’t, not now I know. I don’t think even I’m that much an arsehole.”

“Okay,” Liam says slowly and takes a deep breath in and out as he tries to detach the child that’s currently clinging to him. “I’ve got to go, sweetheart.”

“No.” Javadd states, tiny hands clinging to his t-shirt.

Liam walks closer to Zayn. “I’ll be back tomorrow, I promise.”

“No, no, no.” Javadd cries, tears building his big bambi like eyes that are the image of Zayn’s.

“How about we order a pizza?” Zayn suggests. “I’m kind of hungry.”

Liam looks hopefully at the little boy in his arms but the moment he stops fighting him, the five year old shoves his face back in to the junction where Liam’s neck meets his shoulder.

“I’ll order us a pizza.” Zayn decides, kicking the door shut with his foot as he passes it on the way to the bedroom to get his phone.

When he returns to the living room it’s to find Liam and Javadd cuddled together on the couch and the flat void of Harry.

“He had to get to work,” Liam explains. “He was only doing this as a favour to me.”

“Do you work?” Zayn asks, sitting on the arm of the couch as he flicks through his phone for the pizza number.

“Do you care?” Liam replies, keeping his eyes on the child in his lap.

Zayn shrugs. “I’m just gonna order a plain one and if he wants some different toppings, we can add them when it gets here.”

“He likes ham and pineapple.” Liam informs him.

“Guess he used to steal his mum’s then.” Zayn replies with a slight smile which Liam only slightly mimics.

Zayn can’t look at the hurt in the other lad’s eyes anymore so he gets back up from the couch and presses the phone to his ear to order them all a pizza.

They sit in silence as they wait for the pizza to come so Zayn flicks on the TV to fill the room that’s void of noise and to mute all the thoughts running through his head. He flicks through different channels until he finds one that has Javadd lift his head and surprisingly it’s not a kids channel that makes him do that but some cooking channel.

“Harry makes him watch them all the time,” Liam informs Zayn, brushing his fingers through Javadd’s hair in a manner that seems to calm them both. “You like to bake with uncle H. Don’t you, bud?”

Javadd nods and looks to Liam and then back at the TV. “Can we bake, daddy?”

“Not today, sweetheart.” Liam tells him.

Javadd doesn’t kick up a fuss like Zayn expects. Instead, he settles back down against Liam’s chest and keeps his curious eyes on the two women who are cooking on the TV.

“We could bake?” Zayn offers. “I don’t have much in but there’s an Asda’s down the road. We could pop down and get some things.”

Liam looks down at Javadd like the sentences weren’t aimed at both of them. “Do you want to some baking with Zayn, babe?”

“And daddy.” Javadd replies, without taking his eyes off the TV.

“No, daddy has to go.” Liam informs him. “But you can stay and do some baking with Zayn and then daddy will come and pick you up tomorrow.”

“No.” Javadd replies sternly.

“You could stay?” Zayn offers. “I don’t, like, I don’t want him to get upset. I wouldn’t have wanted to be randomly left with some stranger when I was five either.”

Liam still doesn’t look at him but instead at the child in his arms who looks content with watching the women cooking on the TV, as long as his ‘daddy’ doesn’t go anywhere.

“I could pop down the road and get some stuff for us to bake with,” Zayn continues. “You could stick around and bake with us for a few hours, then when you eventually have to leave, he might not freak out as much.”

Liam is quiet for a really long time that Zayn assumes the answers is no until the other lad slowly nods his head. “Alright but don’t buy actual baking goods, his favourite things to make are cornflake cakes.”

“One box of cornflakes and a ton of chocolate coming up.” Zayn decides as he gets up from the couch. “The pizza shouldn’t be more than a tenner.”

“I’ve got it.” Liam tells him before Zayn can get his wallet out.

“Don’t, like, don’t leave.” Zayn pleads, glancing at the little boy in Liam’s lap.

“I’m not legally allowed to.” Liam replies which isn’t an agreement really.

“I’ll be ten minutes max.” Zayn tells him and takes one more look at the little mini me still curled up in Liam’s lap before he leaves the apartment.

***

When Zayn gets back to his apartment—a shopping bag in each hand because he maybe stumbled in to the kids aisle in Asda and picked up a few things—it’s to find a little boy and a man on his couch, both snacking on a pizza slice with the open box resting on the coffee table and another cooking programme on the TV.

The sight does something to Zayn but he swallows down all the feelings attempting to build and heads across the apartment to the kitchen instead.

“Did you add some ham and mushrooms?” He asks as he starts unpacking the shopping bags.

“Yeah, well we added mushrooms.” Liam informs. “We were told the ham in your fridge wasn’t safe to use.”

“You were?” Zayn questions but he swallows the ‘by who’ when he spots his best friend coming in from the balcony, a swift smell of smoke following him that makes Liam frown.

“You were trying to murder your guests with gone off ham, Zaynie.” Louis teases.

Zayn cringes as the old nickname and glares at his friend. “You’re supposed to be at the gallery.”

“I took the day off,” Louis informs him casually. “Was way too hungover to work.”

“You took a day off for a hangover?” Liam questions, clear shock written on his face.

Louis picks up a pizza slice and drops himself on Zayn’s warn out recliner with a shrug. An irritated look appears on Liam’s face and Zayn knows he needs to get Louis to leave, before Liam steals Javadd and he never sees either of them again.

“Louis,” Zayn says pointedly, nodding towards the bedroom. “Can I talk to you for a minute?”

Louis huffs but drags himself up off the recliner, dropping his half eaten pizza slice back in to the box. Zayn does not miss how that makes the irritated look on Liam’s face only hardens. He offers his best apologetic smile and drags Louis by the scruff of his t-shirt in to the bedroom.

“You’re pulling dilfs now,” Louis starts and then he’s off. “I mean he’s really fit, if the whole angry looking body builder does it for you. But I guess anything does it for you days, really. But a dad, Z? I thought you didn’t do baggage, you dumped that one guy because he owned a dog, remember? A kid is a way bigger deal, they don’t go away. They’re like a life sentence.”

Zayn makes an irritated noise now because his kid will not be compared to a prison sentence. “You need to go, Louis.”

“Oh come on, Z.” Louis whines. “I came over ‘cause I really need cheering up. I hooked up with this girl last night and I’m pretty sure she’s friends with El.”

“I’ll call you later.” Zayn promises.

“You won’t,” Louis says because he knows him. “You’re a prick, Malik. I don’t know why I stick around.”

“Me either.” Zayn admits.

Louis offers him a sad smile that conveys ‘because without me you’d be all alone’ and Zayn hates that it’s the truth. “Probably because your face is quite pleasing to look at it.”

“I’m sure that’s it.” Zayn agrees, gesturing towards the door.

Louis sighs like he’s insufferable but heads towards the door, back in to the living room. “Right, kids. I’m off. It was nice meeting you both, I doub’t I’ll be seeing you again.”

“Goodbye, Louis.” Zayn growls, tugging open the door.

“Ring me when you can be bothered.” Louis replies, squeezing Zayn’s shoulder as he passes out the door.

Zayn closes the door maybe a little too hard and has a moment to compose himself before he looks to Liam who now’s got a cowering Javadd cuddled in his lap.

“Sorry.” He mumbles and heads back towards the kitchen.

“He the kind of people Jav is gonna be surrounded by?” Liam asks and it’s so fucking judgemental that Zayn’s blood starts to boil.

“That’s my choice not yours.” Zayn replies because he can be prick as well.

Liam’s lips form a straight line and he doesn’t say anything else as he offers Javadd another slice of Pizza.

***

They make cornflake cakes and as they do, the five year old starts to warm up to Zayn. He even manages to stay in the room twice with Zayn while Liam goes to the bathroom. But that doesn’t mean that once the little boy is asleep—after watching the second how to train your dragon—that Zayn thinks it’s sensible for Liam to leave.

“I don’t think,” Zayn starts as he watches the other man put on his shoes. “What if he wakes up?”

“Make him some warm milk and sing some Disney song, it’ll send him straight back to sleep.” Liam instructs while tugging on his other shoe.

“What if that doesn’t work?” Zayn worries.

Liam sighs, the same way Louis had earlier and tugs out his phone. “If anything happens, you can ring me?”

“Okay.” Zayn agrees and jumps up from the couch to fetch his phone from the bedroom.

Liam stares at the Nokia he’s handed when Zayn returns. “This is your phone?”

“I broke my iphone,” Zayn explains, waving off the explanation Liam looks for. “It’s a long story.”

Liam shrugs and types his number in to the phone before handing it back to Zayn. “I’ll be back in the morning.”

“Okay,” Zayn says a little relieved. “We’ll, uh, we’ll be here.”

Liam looks at him like he’s trying to find something Zayn isn’t saying. He must come up blank because he bends down to press a kiss to Javadd’s head, before muttering the three words Zayn hadn’t said to anyone in a long time.

“See ya.” Liam says with a polite nod before heading towards the door.

“Liam?” Zayn calls before he walk out of the apartment.

Liam turns around with his hand paused reaching for the door handle.

“Thanks,” Zayn tells him. “For tonight, and, uh for the last five years I guess.”

Liam nods with the first actual smile Zayn had seen on his lips that wasn’t aimed at Javadd. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“See ya.” Zayn says and when Liam finally leaves, he looks at the little boy sleeping peacefully. “Sorry you got stuck with me, kid.”

***

The sun is starting to break the horizon when Zayn blinks himself awake the next morning. He groans, not knowing what absurd thing would mean he’s awake this early but as he tries to turn, to get more comfortable and shy away from the light breaking through the winnow, he realises he’s on the couch. Then he hears the thing that had woken him, the loud screams of ‘mummy’ echoing from his bedroom.

He almost trips twice over his own feet in the speed he tries to get to the bedroom but when he gets there, it’s to find his bed vacant of five year old boy. 

“Mummy!” Javadd screams from inside Zayn’s closet.

Zayn walks towards it and tries to tug it open but tiny hands work on holding it closed. “Javadd, open the door.”

“I want my mummy.” Javadd screams at him, followed by a loud sniffle.

Zayn’s heart breaks. “Mummy’s not here right now, babe.”

“I want daddy.” Javadd informs him, followed by another sniffle.

“Daddy will be here in the morning,” Zayn informs him. “Come on, come out of the closet and we can watch cooking shows until he gets here, yeah?”

“No!” Javadd screams at him and then starts properly crying.

It’s not attention seeking crying either, it’s proper crying like he’s terrified and Zayn’s the reason for those tears. If he’d signed the papers, then the little boy would have gone home with Liam and not had to be put through this trauma. Damn Liam for not staying when Zayn had asked.

As he curses Liam in his mind, he rushes back in to the living room to grab his phone and dial the other lad’s number with shaking hands.

“Zayn?” Liam asks after one ring. “What’s happened? Is Jav okay?”

“He locked himself in the closet and is crying his eyes out.” Zayn informs him. “You need to come, like now.”

“I can’t.” Liam tells him. “This is your job now, Zayn. You’re his father.”

“He’s screaming for you, Liam.” Zayn argues, walking back to the room where Javadd still cries.

“He wants his dad,” Liam informs him sternly, though the crack in his voice gives him away. “You’re his dad.”

“Not as far as he’s concerned.” Zayn replies, sliding down the wall next to the closet. “To him I’m some random guy who’s taken away his daddy after someone else took away his mummy.”

“Fuck.” Liam says when Javadd’s screams get louder and Zayn imagines him running his fingers through his thick hair.

“Just come over?” Zayn pleads. “I’ll sign away my rights. As long as you let me see him from time to time then I’ll sign the paper. Please, just come. I can’t listen to this anymore.”

“I want my daddy!” Javadd chants. “I want my daddy!”

“Shit, okay.” Liam caves. “I’m coming. I’ll be like ten minutes, will you be okay?” 

“I don’t know,” Zayn admits. “What can I do?”

“Talk to him?” Liam offers.

“I tried that.” Zayn argues.

“Try again.” Liam says firmer. “I’ll be ten minutes.”

Zayn glares at his phone when the call rings off but drops it to the floor when Javadd starts crying again. He crawls in front of the cupboard and attempts to draw the child out by talking softly about how daddy was on his way, and then it’ll all be okay.

***

Javadd’s stopped crying by the time Liam arrives but he’s still refusing to open the door. Still Zayn counts the first of the two a win because he’d done that, he’d managed to calm him down.

“Jav? Babe? It’s daddy.” Liam tells him. “Can you open the door?”

“Daddy?” Javadd asks a little cautious.

“It’s me, sweetheart.” Liam assures him, kneeling down next to Zayn on the floor. “Open the door, yeah?”

It’s slow, the way Javadd opens the door but once he gets it open enough to see Liam, he’s crawling out of it and straight in to the man’s awaiting arms.

“I want mummy.” Javadd explains.

Liam rubs his back gently and hums. “Me too, babe.”

“I want my mummy.” Javadd repeats, his voice cracking in a way that breaks whatever is left of Zayn’s heart.

It seems to affect Liam too because Zayn can see the tears catching the corner of his eyes, as he gently rocks the upset little boy in his arms.

Ten minutes and a lot of soothing it takes for Javadd to drift off to sleep in Liam’s arms. Zayn find himself playing with Javadd’s tiny fingers where they’re curled around Liam’s t-shirt, as they sit with their backs against the bed waiting for his soft breathes to fill the room.

“Is he asleep?” Liam whispers, unable to see Javadd’s face from where it’s resting on his shoulder, face turned in Zayn’s direction.

“Out for the count.” Zayn replies, moving his hand to trace parts of Javadd’s face without actually touching him.

Liam lifts him and the little boy gently to a standing point and then he moves around the bed to place Javadd down in it. Zayn watches him once again kiss his forehead and whispers those words. He feels like he’s intruding, even though the baby lying on the bed technically belongs to him and has his blood running through him. Because at the end of the day, in Javadd’s little mind, that doesn’t matter because the only people in his life he trusts are the ones who have been there from the start

“Come on.” Liam says as he walks past Zayn out of the bedroom.

“Do you want a cup of tea?” Zayn asks once they’re stood awkwardly in the main part of the flat.

“Got coffee?” Lee replies, settling on one of the bar stools after he follows Zayn to the kitchen.

“Somewhere.” Zayn says as he begins to search the cupboards.

Liam’s quiet until Zayn’s stretching up to get some coffee Louis probably hid in the back of one of his empty cupboards. “You shouldn’t sign the paper.”

Zayn almost drops the glass jar.

“Not right away,” Liam tells him. “I don’t want to be the person Jav hates when he’s a teenager, and asking why his real daddy didn’t want him.”

“I want him,” Zayn defends, putting the coffee on the counter. “I do.”

“It’s been one day.” Liam says.

“Yeah,” Zee replies and drags his fingers through his hair. “I gained a kid overnight. Do you realise how mad that is?”

“I do, yeah.” Liam agrees.

Zayn leans his back against the counter opposite where Liam sits. “She already had him when you met, didn’t she?”

“He was almost one when I met her.” Liam explains. “Bit different than a five year old and it’s not like she decided to let me be this big part of his life straight away. I couldn’t even imagine being you right now.”

“I can’t even imagine being me right now.” Zayn admits.

Liam laughs lightly, it’s quite a nice sound Zayn thinks and then quickly un-thinks it. “We’ll help each other, yeah? I think that’s the only way we make it through this.”

“I think, uh, I think maybe Javadd should stay with you.” Zayn suggests. “At least until I can get a place where it’s like appropriate for a kid. I could come for like visits, you know when you like adopt a kid and you have to have scheduled visits so the kid can get used to you.”

“H says that’s what should have happened here,” Liam informs him. “But the social worker assigned to us was a bit shit. Thank god my best mates a lawyer, you know. Or Jav would have been snatched from us and sent to you without us even knowing about it.”

“I wouldn’t want that.” Zayn frowns.

Liam nods but doesn’t say anything else so Zayn works on making himself some tea and Liam some coffee.

They settle on the couch with their drinks, neither talking because they’re clearly to sleep deprived to hold a conversation. Zayn can’t help but watch Liam, who seems to twitch every time even the slightest noise comes from the bedroom. Eventually Zayn tries to drift off to sleep but keeps jolting awake with every twitch Liam does.

“Would you go in and sleep with him,” Zayn complains. “Your constant jumping is keeping me awake.”

“It’s your bedroom.” Liam argues.

“It’s also my couch,” Zayn reminds him. “I can stretch out on it, if you bugger off to the bedroom.”

Liam’s quiet for a moment and then he gets up from the couch. “Okay.”

“See you in the morning,” Zayn says as he stretches himself out. “Or when the sun rises a bit more in the sky.”

“Sleep tight, Zayn.” Liam replies.

Zayn can’t help but love the way his name rolls of the other lad’s tongue but then he quickly scolds himself, because having a thing for the person who your kid thinks is his dad but isn’t his dad but the best friend of your ex-girlfriend who for some reason forgot to mention she was pregnant, is way too complicated.

**Author's Note:**

> So I've jumped back in the 1d/zayn fandom since his solo career has kicked off and obviously with that comes awful writing. 
> 
> So, here were are. 
> 
> One picture of a little boy that looks a bit like Zayn and this idea pops in to my head. This was hastily written so please dont judge. If I continue to write it, I promise the writing will get better but I needed this idea out there to see if it's worth actually writing thirty thousand or so words. If that happens the characters will have more depth and the plot will come in to play a lot more. I've never written a fic in chapter form like this so I'm quite excited to be able do that, to see if it's something I actually like doing. 
> 
> Anyway, here you go. 
> 
> Hope you like it x
> 
> Follow me on tumblr: letsyesnomaybe.tumblr.com


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